Clearing Up Stuck Souls, Ghosts...(and the rest of it.)
“I am outnumbered.”
The thought sat in my stomach as if I had swallowed a brick. Last weekend, I was standing in a popular bookstore, looking through the shelves for books about mediumship. I was on a mission to discover where people–everyday, average, bereaved people–are getting information about the afterlife.
The shelf was littered with books featuring dark covers with scary, transparent figures. Words like: ghost, demons, haunting, possession, psychic attack—everywhere.
My eyes searched for the books about Heaven.
Nearly all of them have a sky on the cover with radiant light beaming out—perhaps have you seen them? I picked a few up and flipped through them. More than one of them covered the topics of spirit release, ghost busting and negative entities.
Again, the heavy thought: “I am outnumbered. I cannot make a difference.”
Is my deceased loved one okay? Are they stuck in limbo? Did they transition to Heaven?
“I am outnumbered.”
The thought sat in my stomach as if I had swallowed a brick. Last weekend, I was standing in a popular bookstore, looking through the shelves for books about mediumship. I was on a mission to discover where people–everyday, average, bereaved people–are getting information about the afterlife.
The shelf was littered with books featuring dark covers with scary, transparent figures. Words like: ghost, demons, haunting, possession, psychic attack—everywhere.
My eyes searched for the books about Heaven. Nearly all of them have a sky on the cover with radiant light beaming out—perhaps have you seen them? I picked a few up and flipped through them. More than one of them covered the topics of spirit release, ghost busting and negative entities.
Again, the heavy thought: “I am outnumbered. I cannot make a difference.”
The evening before, near the end of a group session in Madison, Wisconsin, a young woman who sat weeping, cradled in the arms of an older woman, asked me a question. I presumed them to be mother and daughter.
“My sister had a session with a medium who told her that my grandfather couldn’t communicate because he didn’t cross over and was stuck. My grandfather was a wonderful man who believed in God and led a good life. This has been so upsetting to our family. Is my grandfather okay, and why would this happen?”
I took a deep breath and counted to five.
You see, this is something I deal with every single week. And it makes my blood boil. I am so angry and disappointed at the choices other so-called mediums are making because I am often the one cleaning up the emotional mess they create.
In another example, a widow recently requested an emergency session because she was so upset by a session with another medium. She shared with me later that she had chosen the medium based upon the criteria of an inexpensive price and availability for an in-person meeting.
When the time came for her phone session, I immediately connected with her husband who had recently passed.
The reading began with her husband communicating: “Tell her I died on the best day of my life, doing what I loved.”
“He did. He truly did,” she said.
After her successful session with me, my client went on to explain that the previous medium started the session by vocally asking permission from her 34 “Spirit Guides” to connect with my client’s deceased husband. It just got worse from there. The medium stated she couldn’t connect with the husband because he was so mad at himself. He was kicking himself for dying, and stuck.
A few years ago, I had a similar experience with a young widow, who, at the end of her extremely validating phone session said to me, “Are you absolutely sure he’s all right and doesn’t blame me for his death?”
I was shocked by the question! For the last hour I had given her validations and messages of great caring and love from her young husband who acknowledged that his choices led to his passing. He died from a disease called alcoholism. I stress that this is a disease, a valid one—and not a lifestyle choice. It starts as a choice to begin drinking, but addiction takes over.
I asked her why she would even dream of posing this question after having so many validations brought forward over the last hour.
The culprit? She had seen a medium who said her husband couldn’t communicate with her because he was tormented and blamed her for his death. She should have done more, the medium said.
She was in emotional agony. As if losing her life partner and raising their child alone wasn’t a daunting enough task, now she had to also worry about him holding a grudge in the afterlife.
Last month, a woman posted repeatedly on my Facebook page, begging me to call her. English was her second language, she didn’t have full access to the Internet and her daughter had just died. She had urgent questions. Thankfully, she happened to call my office while I was in and I was able to answer.
She told me she had been to see a medium who told her that in order to spiritually connect with her daughter she had to get rid of all her daughter's possessions, “let her go” and wait 40 days. She sobbed into the phone saying she just couldn’t bring herself to throw away her daughter’s clothing, etc.
This is INSANITY. I was so upset, I prodded for the name of the medium in Chicago so I could personally hunt her down! I cannot fathom where anyone would get this information! To throw away a beloved child’s personal belongings in order to have a reading? A mandatory waiting period? I have done successful sessions with clients HOURS after a loved one’s passing. In her agony, this bereaved mother didn’t know what to believe. How could she be burdened to sort out what is spiritually true while undergoing the absolute worst trauma of her life?
Not a week goes by without someone coming to me with emotional pain caused by a bad experience with a medium. I could go on citing examples for endless days!
What gives?! My frustration with this left me stewing about what to write for a long time. I have hesitated for the simple reason that I know my stand will be unpopular, without much peer support, and I will probably lose friends.
I know some very nice people, fellow mediums, who regularly promote their practice of spirit attachment release, ghost busting and home clearings for stuck souls. I like these people and don’t want to lose their friendship.
The time has come for me to do a clearing of my own. I can’t be quiet anymore.
It is not accurate, ethical or correct for a medium to be on both sides of the fence. You cannot say, “Your loved ones are at peace.” And then, “Except maybe those souls who got stuck when they died by suicide or trauma.”
We need a complete overhaul of these false beliefs.
First of all: Where did anyone learn that a Soul could be stuck? Was that idea taught by someone who simply shared the idea that a Soul could be stuck? How many generations of teachers perpetuate the idea of stuck Souls? Does it ever stop? Where is the proof? Where is the evidence?
Second of all: How can anyone know with exactness and authority the specific details of the afterlife? Again, where is the proof? Where is the evidence?
I have read hundreds of books about people’s individual experiences with the afterlife. Everything from dreams, experiences had while in a coma, near death experiences, back from death experiences; all of it. Many stories share similar themes, but they vary widely in the details. Even faith traditions have widely varying views of what happens after this life, and sometimes even they change their official opinions. In April of 2007, Pope Benedict XVI officially did away with the state of limbo for the Catholic Church –after 800 years of indoctrination!! Throw in the fear based drama on the Internet and social media, and it’s nearly impossible to know who or what to believe.
STOP!
Let me tell you everything I know about the afterlife: Who we are, our Soul, doesn’t die or cease communicating upon the death of the physical body.
This I can prove to you by providing verifiable details and facts received by mental telepathy from the deceased and what they see happening in your life since their death.
Honestly, that’s it. That is all I can prove.
Everything else that I can share with you is information based on my experiences within the context of a “reading” or spirit communication done for clients. If I present you with information you don’t agree with, please disregard it and use your own truth barometer to decide what works for you.
This leaves most questions open-ended and up for personal interpretation.
The question I get asked the most often is: Is my loved one at peace?
With all of the books, TV shows, websites and mediums promoting ghosts, earthbound souls, and hauntings--I get it. I deeply understand your panic and need to know if your loved one is okay. It is our human nature to care about the wellbeing of our children, spouses and friends, and when they die, and we can no longer see and speak with them to verify if they are indeed, “okay,” panic can quickly take over.
A medium seems like miracle cure for this; someone who can see and communicate with the dead. Surely, someone with this ability can assuage our pain by letting us know how the deceased loved one is doing. Right?
Well, let me tell you a little about people with spiritual abilities. I’ll start with me.
I did not request this ability. In fact, I didn’t even want it when it showed up in my life. I tried everything to get rid of it. I no more choose to be a medium than I choose to have freckles.
And neither did most other people with spiritual abilities. It happens to people in all walks of life, on every continent and with every personality type. Some people born with a spiritual ability are complete jerks. Some higher power didn’t select a chosen few to act as earth angels with spiritual abilities.
Just like some folks have light hair, some people can communicate with the dead. Just like some light-haired people will be up to no good in life, so will some people with spiritual abilities.
Anyone with an ability is given free will to use it as they choose.
And anyone seeking the assistance of a person with a spiritual ability is free to choose with whom they would like to work.
What I am hoping you will take away from this article is:
As a Spiritual practitioner the “services” you choose to offer may cause extreme, deep and lasting pain for bereaved persons if you cannot provide them with a validating connection. The only, and I mean ONLY thing you should say to a client you cannot provide healing validation to is: “I am sorry. I am unable to connect.” Accept full responsibility, and nothing less. It is honorable and ethical to be truthful and say that you cannot connect.
A medium’s inability to provide a validating connection is the fault of the medium, and not the deceased.
As a Spiritual client you are responsible for doing your research before booking a session. You must educate yourself about the differences betweens mediums and psychics; having a session by phone or in-person; and finding a medium who has garnered a reputation for healing work over a long period of time. Watching television shows is NOT educational about how mediumship works. It is entertainment, for which you pay quite dearly each month. Just look at your cable bill. If you book an appointment with a medium who also offers to “release” stuck souls, you have been forewarned that they may tell you your loved one is stuck, too.
You must accept the responsibility for doing the research to book a medium who is known for accuracy and ethics. No one will ever try to stop you from booking the psychic a friend knows, who for $65 will do a reading for you in a pub every other Thursday night. Is your pain that casual? So it can be healed in a restaurant in 5-10 minutes in front of a room full of people? Or do you need a private session focused on you alone? This is your choice.
Your healing is your responsibility.
To create a world full of ethical and responsible mediums is a battle I know I will never win. To teach every average bereaved person how to select a medium who is right for them, or better, how to connect on their own—is a mountain I cannot climb.
But, I have just made you think. And that means I may have helped one person reconsider these unhealthy beliefs. Whether you are the spiritual worker or the person seeking help, I ask you to please uphold the highest standards for healing.
Personal responsibility matters. We are all connected and the choices we make create a ripple effect of fear or love. The choice is yours.
Disclaimer: This article reflects my opinion and belief that a person who has died is "okay." My belief is a result of having the first hand experience of delivering thousands of validating, verifiable messages from a person who died. At no point, in any session, be it a private or a public group, has a deceased person reported being stuck, held back, unwell, unwilling or unable to communicate for any reason whatsoever. I have ended a few private sessions where the information received was not understood, but never a case where that was the fault of the deceased. If this belief doesn't work for you, please disregard it.
I stand firmly in the belief that it is spiritually safe to die. If I stand alone, I am okay with that.
©Mollie Morning Star 2016. Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet, provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.
Preparing for a Wonderful Session
Every day I see people in need of a healing mediumship session sabotage their opportunity because they are uninformed about my number one top tip to ensure a wonderful connection. Over the past few years, the interest in mediumship has absolutely exploded. So many people are seeking a personal session but don't know where to start. I'm here to help! After years of doing professional readings, I'd love to share three of my top tips to make certain you have the helpful experience you need to take the next step on your path toward healing after a loss.
Over the past few years, the interest in mediumship has absolutely exploded. So many people are seeking a personal session but don't know where to start. After years of doing professional readings, I'd love to share my top tips to ensure you have the helpful experience you need to take the next step on your path toward healing after a loss.
1. Keep your information to yourself. If you only take ONE single piece of knowledge away from reading this article, please, let it be this. When you are seeking evidence validating the existence of the afterlife, it is absolutely VITAL that you do not share information about your deceased loved one, or yourself, with a medium prior to the session. It is the job of the medium to work with the Soul/Spirit of your loved one to obtain facts and evidence that validate their identity and proof of survival.
Actions to consider:
- Do not allow mediums to have access to your Facebook profile by being their "Friend" on Facebook.
- "Like" professional pages on Facebook and and opt to get notifications when they update their page. (If you don't opt for notifications, you will not receive their posts.)
- Have a friend book your session for you and use a false name. That's a bit extreme, but if you are concerned, then simply do it.
- Do not email a medium and tell them who you are hoping to reach. It will hinder, not help your connection.
I cannot stress this enough: this is the most important component of a great session and it is completely your responsibility to keep your information private. This is why I do not read for friends nor do I recommend repeated sessions.
2. Keep your connection options open. Very few people live within a reasonable driving distance of a reputable medium; having your session by telephone, Skype or FaceTime is almost always the best solution. I have been doing phone/Skype sessions for years with excellent success. I recommend it over an in-person session for three main reasons:
- Ease of scheduling and on-time appointments
- Access to reputable, excellent mediums no matter where you live
- Additional evidence can be given when you are not visible to the medium
The most interesting part of this is the last. I cannot tell you how many phone sessions I have done for people where their deceased loved one communicated something like, "Tell her I love her short, blonde hair." When in fact, the person on the other end of the phone had undergone a drastic hair change since their loved one's passing. During one phone session, a deceased husband communicated to his living wife that he saw a problem with his wife's neck, and he noted that it was quite serious. The reply was priceless, "Oh my!! I'm sitting here in a neck brace and I am having surgery in a few weeks!" None of that information would have been validating if the client had been sitting in front of me.
3. Learn all you can before your session. This is especially important for the newly-bereaved. Popular television shows have opened the minds of people everywhere to the possibility of the afterlife, and simultaneously, filled those same minds with a lot of erroneous information. Mediums do not see ghosts and talk to the dead. (At least the reputable, excellent mediums I know do not!) Communication with a deceased loved one is done by mental telepathy; it is a language of energy and of the Soul. It is very subtle. If you come into a session with the expectation of sitting down and talking to your loved one, you will be disappointed. The objective of a session is to receive validations and evidence of the afterlife, and you should expect that outcome. I personally will not conduct a session with anyone until they have allowed me to thoroughly explain how the communication takes place from a technical standpoint. Only then will I proceed with communication. For me to jump right into the session would be similar to offering the newly-bereaved a session in Japanese, when they don't speak the language. Want to know more? Here are some terrific books to get you started:
- All books by George Anderson including, "Walking in the Garden of Souls" and "Lessons from the Light"
- "Soul Shift" and "Messages from the Afterlife" by Mark Ireland
- The Power of the Soul by John Holland
These are just my top three tips, but there is so much more information available on my blog. Please take some time to read up to prepare yourself for a successful session with the medium you choose.
Oh, and one bonus tip since you made it all the way to the end: remember that celebrity mediums are still celebrities, and entertainment is not education.
©Mollie Morning Star 2014 Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.