Clearing Up Stuck Souls, Ghosts...(and the rest of it.)
“I am outnumbered.”
The thought sat in my stomach as if I had swallowed a brick. Last weekend, I was standing in a popular bookstore, looking through the shelves for books about mediumship. I was on a mission to discover where people–everyday, average, bereaved people–are getting information about the afterlife.
The shelf was littered with books featuring dark covers with scary, transparent figures. Words like: ghost, demons, haunting, possession, psychic attack—everywhere.
My eyes searched for the books about Heaven.
Nearly all of them have a sky on the cover with radiant light beaming out—perhaps have you seen them? I picked a few up and flipped through them. More than one of them covered the topics of spirit release, ghost busting and negative entities.
Again, the heavy thought: “I am outnumbered. I cannot make a difference.”
Is my deceased loved one okay? Are they stuck in limbo? Did they transition to Heaven?
“I am outnumbered.”
The thought sat in my stomach as if I had swallowed a brick. Last weekend, I was standing in a popular bookstore, looking through the shelves for books about mediumship. I was on a mission to discover where people–everyday, average, bereaved people–are getting information about the afterlife.
The shelf was littered with books featuring dark covers with scary, transparent figures. Words like: ghost, demons, haunting, possession, psychic attack—everywhere.
My eyes searched for the books about Heaven. Nearly all of them have a sky on the cover with radiant light beaming out—perhaps have you seen them? I picked a few up and flipped through them. More than one of them covered the topics of spirit release, ghost busting and negative entities.
Again, the heavy thought: “I am outnumbered. I cannot make a difference.”
The evening before, near the end of a group session in Madison, Wisconsin, a young woman who sat weeping, cradled in the arms of an older woman, asked me a question. I presumed them to be mother and daughter.
“My sister had a session with a medium who told her that my grandfather couldn’t communicate because he didn’t cross over and was stuck. My grandfather was a wonderful man who believed in God and led a good life. This has been so upsetting to our family. Is my grandfather okay, and why would this happen?”
I took a deep breath and counted to five.
You see, this is something I deal with every single week. And it makes my blood boil. I am so angry and disappointed at the choices other so-called mediums are making because I am often the one cleaning up the emotional mess they create.
In another example, a widow recently requested an emergency session because she was so upset by a session with another medium. She shared with me later that she had chosen the medium based upon the criteria of an inexpensive price and availability for an in-person meeting.
When the time came for her phone session, I immediately connected with her husband who had recently passed.
The reading began with her husband communicating: “Tell her I died on the best day of my life, doing what I loved.”
“He did. He truly did,” she said.
After her successful session with me, my client went on to explain that the previous medium started the session by vocally asking permission from her 34 “Spirit Guides” to connect with my client’s deceased husband. It just got worse from there. The medium stated she couldn’t connect with the husband because he was so mad at himself. He was kicking himself for dying, and stuck.
A few years ago, I had a similar experience with a young widow, who, at the end of her extremely validating phone session said to me, “Are you absolutely sure he’s all right and doesn’t blame me for his death?”
I was shocked by the question! For the last hour I had given her validations and messages of great caring and love from her young husband who acknowledged that his choices led to his passing. He died from a disease called alcoholism. I stress that this is a disease, a valid one—and not a lifestyle choice. It starts as a choice to begin drinking, but addiction takes over.
I asked her why she would even dream of posing this question after having so many validations brought forward over the last hour.
The culprit? She had seen a medium who said her husband couldn’t communicate with her because he was tormented and blamed her for his death. She should have done more, the medium said.
She was in emotional agony. As if losing her life partner and raising their child alone wasn’t a daunting enough task, now she had to also worry about him holding a grudge in the afterlife.
Last month, a woman posted repeatedly on my Facebook page, begging me to call her. English was her second language, she didn’t have full access to the Internet and her daughter had just died. She had urgent questions. Thankfully, she happened to call my office while I was in and I was able to answer.
She told me she had been to see a medium who told her that in order to spiritually connect with her daughter she had to get rid of all her daughter's possessions, “let her go” and wait 40 days. She sobbed into the phone saying she just couldn’t bring herself to throw away her daughter’s clothing, etc.
This is INSANITY. I was so upset, I prodded for the name of the medium in Chicago so I could personally hunt her down! I cannot fathom where anyone would get this information! To throw away a beloved child’s personal belongings in order to have a reading? A mandatory waiting period? I have done successful sessions with clients HOURS after a loved one’s passing. In her agony, this bereaved mother didn’t know what to believe. How could she be burdened to sort out what is spiritually true while undergoing the absolute worst trauma of her life?
Not a week goes by without someone coming to me with emotional pain caused by a bad experience with a medium. I could go on citing examples for endless days!
What gives?! My frustration with this left me stewing about what to write for a long time. I have hesitated for the simple reason that I know my stand will be unpopular, without much peer support, and I will probably lose friends.
I know some very nice people, fellow mediums, who regularly promote their practice of spirit attachment release, ghost busting and home clearings for stuck souls. I like these people and don’t want to lose their friendship.
The time has come for me to do a clearing of my own. I can’t be quiet anymore.
It is not accurate, ethical or correct for a medium to be on both sides of the fence. You cannot say, “Your loved ones are at peace.” And then, “Except maybe those souls who got stuck when they died by suicide or trauma.”
We need a complete overhaul of these false beliefs.
First of all: Where did anyone learn that a Soul could be stuck? Was that idea taught by someone who simply shared the idea that a Soul could be stuck? How many generations of teachers perpetuate the idea of stuck Souls? Does it ever stop? Where is the proof? Where is the evidence?
Second of all: How can anyone know with exactness and authority the specific details of the afterlife? Again, where is the proof? Where is the evidence?
I have read hundreds of books about people’s individual experiences with the afterlife. Everything from dreams, experiences had while in a coma, near death experiences, back from death experiences; all of it. Many stories share similar themes, but they vary widely in the details. Even faith traditions have widely varying views of what happens after this life, and sometimes even they change their official opinions. In April of 2007, Pope Benedict XVI officially did away with the state of limbo for the Catholic Church –after 800 years of indoctrination!! Throw in the fear based drama on the Internet and social media, and it’s nearly impossible to know who or what to believe.
STOP!
Let me tell you everything I know about the afterlife: Who we are, our Soul, doesn’t die or cease communicating upon the death of the physical body.
This I can prove to you by providing verifiable details and facts received by mental telepathy from the deceased and what they see happening in your life since their death.
Honestly, that’s it. That is all I can prove.
Everything else that I can share with you is information based on my experiences within the context of a “reading” or spirit communication done for clients. If I present you with information you don’t agree with, please disregard it and use your own truth barometer to decide what works for you.
This leaves most questions open-ended and up for personal interpretation.
The question I get asked the most often is: Is my loved one at peace?
With all of the books, TV shows, websites and mediums promoting ghosts, earthbound souls, and hauntings--I get it. I deeply understand your panic and need to know if your loved one is okay. It is our human nature to care about the wellbeing of our children, spouses and friends, and when they die, and we can no longer see and speak with them to verify if they are indeed, “okay,” panic can quickly take over.
A medium seems like miracle cure for this; someone who can see and communicate with the dead. Surely, someone with this ability can assuage our pain by letting us know how the deceased loved one is doing. Right?
Well, let me tell you a little about people with spiritual abilities. I’ll start with me.
I did not request this ability. In fact, I didn’t even want it when it showed up in my life. I tried everything to get rid of it. I no more choose to be a medium than I choose to have freckles.
And neither did most other people with spiritual abilities. It happens to people in all walks of life, on every continent and with every personality type. Some people born with a spiritual ability are complete jerks. Some higher power didn’t select a chosen few to act as earth angels with spiritual abilities.
Just like some folks have light hair, some people can communicate with the dead. Just like some light-haired people will be up to no good in life, so will some people with spiritual abilities.
Anyone with an ability is given free will to use it as they choose.
And anyone seeking the assistance of a person with a spiritual ability is free to choose with whom they would like to work.
What I am hoping you will take away from this article is:
As a Spiritual practitioner the “services” you choose to offer may cause extreme, deep and lasting pain for bereaved persons if you cannot provide them with a validating connection. The only, and I mean ONLY thing you should say to a client you cannot provide healing validation to is: “I am sorry. I am unable to connect.” Accept full responsibility, and nothing less. It is honorable and ethical to be truthful and say that you cannot connect.
A medium’s inability to provide a validating connection is the fault of the medium, and not the deceased.
As a Spiritual client you are responsible for doing your research before booking a session. You must educate yourself about the differences betweens mediums and psychics; having a session by phone or in-person; and finding a medium who has garnered a reputation for healing work over a long period of time. Watching television shows is NOT educational about how mediumship works. It is entertainment, for which you pay quite dearly each month. Just look at your cable bill. If you book an appointment with a medium who also offers to “release” stuck souls, you have been forewarned that they may tell you your loved one is stuck, too.
You must accept the responsibility for doing the research to book a medium who is known for accuracy and ethics. No one will ever try to stop you from booking the psychic a friend knows, who for $65 will do a reading for you in a pub every other Thursday night. Is your pain that casual? So it can be healed in a restaurant in 5-10 minutes in front of a room full of people? Or do you need a private session focused on you alone? This is your choice.
Your healing is your responsibility.
To create a world full of ethical and responsible mediums is a battle I know I will never win. To teach every average bereaved person how to select a medium who is right for them, or better, how to connect on their own—is a mountain I cannot climb.
But, I have just made you think. And that means I may have helped one person reconsider these unhealthy beliefs. Whether you are the spiritual worker or the person seeking help, I ask you to please uphold the highest standards for healing.
Personal responsibility matters. We are all connected and the choices we make create a ripple effect of fear or love. The choice is yours.
Disclaimer: This article reflects my opinion and belief that a person who has died is "okay." My belief is a result of having the first hand experience of delivering thousands of validating, verifiable messages from a person who died. At no point, in any session, be it a private or a public group, has a deceased person reported being stuck, held back, unwell, unwilling or unable to communicate for any reason whatsoever. I have ended a few private sessions where the information received was not understood, but never a case where that was the fault of the deceased. If this belief doesn't work for you, please disregard it.
I stand firmly in the belief that it is spiritually safe to die. If I stand alone, I am okay with that.
©Mollie Morning Star 2016. Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet, provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.
VIDEO BLOG: Addressing the Myths of Suicide.
Evidential Psychic Medium, Mollie Morning Star, answers questions from a bereaved woman who has experienced phenomena in her home after her fiancee's suicide. Mollie shares her knowledge and puts to rest some of the myths associated about what happens to a soul who completes suicide. The blog wraps up with recommended resources for those who are rebuilding their lives after this type of loss.
Evidential Psychic Medium, Mollie Morning Star, answers questions from a bereaved woman who has experienced phenomena in her home after her fiancee's suicide. Mollie shares her knowledge and puts to rest some of the myths about what happens to a soul who completes suicide. The blog wraps up with recommended resources for those who are rebuilding their lives after this type of loss. The Alliance of Hope can be found at www.allianceofhope.org Click HERE to visit their website.
You should also read this article from 2014: Opening Up About Suicide
We'd love for you to submit a question for the next video blog! Please use the form found HERE.
©Mollie Morning Star 2015 Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.
How Do You Perceive Reality?
Have you had upsetting thoughts about a passed loved one missing your important life events such as the birth of a child, weddings or serious illness? You need to read this article for an easy to understand explanation and validation of how your loved ones are definitely seeing what is currently happening in your life.
It’s Spring in the Upper Midwest! Hallelujah! The weather was bright and sunny today and the forecast is above freezing for the next week and a half. Melting snow and rain boot season is here, and it brings with it a vibrant energy of growth. There’s a lot of discussion about when spring really starts. Is it a specific date? When the crocus blooms? For me, it’s when I walk outside and the cold doesn’t hurt my face! (Very low standards here in Wisconsin.)
The return of the birds is one of my favorite signs of spring. They have been chirping their beaks off at dawn for the last two weeks. A few days ago, I saw a frustrated little chickadee out in my garden. It reminded me of one of my favorite analogies for explaining how loved ones in Spirit do not miss out on what happens in our lives.
My garden is very narrow and is shaded by the house most of the day. I usually move my computer up to my dining room to work so I can look out the window and enjoy the flowers. To help me get a better view of my roses, and to increase the amount of light the plants receive, I lean old mirrors against the fence. It’s really neat, and I can see so much more of the garden from my window.
I first spotted the chickadee through the kitchen window while I was pouring my morning coffee. He was hopping around on the snow in front of a mirror and would try to jump into it. He’d fall back onto the snow, shake his head, and do it again. This sort of scene carried on all day. He’d hop onto a hydrangea branch, stare at himself in the mirror and try to jump onto the branch that was reflected in the glass. He’d perch on the top edge of the mirror, lean over, look at himself and AGAIN try to somersault into what he perceived as another part of the garden.
Mirrors provide an interesting view, don’t they? In the chickadee’s case, he just couldn’t see beyond his own reality.
One of the great concerns people share with me during their grieving is that their loved ones didn’t live to see their grandchildren, graduations, weddings, etc.
But your loved ones in Spirit really do see what happens after they pass. They share those special moments with you, both the joyous and difficult ones.
To help people understand this better, I explain it like this:
Everyone has seen a television show with a police questioning room in it. The subject sits on a chair alone and is surrounded by walls made of two-way mirrors. All he can see is his own reality reflected back at him. Yet on the “Other Side” of those mirrors sit many people who are able to see through the glass and observe everything the subject is doing.
Easy to understand, right? We get very caught up in our reality, because it’s all we can see in the looking glass. But that is not true for our loved ones who have passed into the next dimension—call it Heaven, the Other Side, the Spirit World, or whatever you like. They don’t miss anything!
Just a few weeks ago I connected a family to their son who had recently passed. After his message, he communicated for me to “Tell my mom I see the new broom.” Sure enough, she had just bought a new broom for the kitchen. If he sees the new broom, he certainly sees the big things that are happening! It’s important to pay attention to these kinds of small details during a connection with a medium. They are so specific that only those living in the home will be able to validate them. Non-Google-able, as I like to say.
Try to remember the mirror analogy next time you feel that wave of sadness creep in and you think of what your loved one is missing. They see you. They send you their support and prayers.
©Mollie Morning Star 2014 Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.
Signs of Hope.
There is nothing like the holiday season's ability to inspire us with joy or fill us with sorrow, practically at the same time. The melody of a familiar Christmas carol, the smell of cookies and pine, and the unpacking of family ornaments all have the potential to whisk our hearts back to happy moments. And it's a wonderful place to linger; memories of a cherished loved one are absolutely the greatest gift we can ever receive and hold dear.
Your loved ones in Spirit are aware of how much they are missed during celebrations, and they wish to make their loving presence known...
There is nothing like the holiday season's ability to inspire us with joy or fill us with sorrow, practically at the same time. The melody of a familiar Christmas carol, the smell of cookies and pine, and the unpacking of family ornaments all have the potential to whisk our hearts back to happy moments. And it's a wonderful place to linger; memories of a cherished loved one are absolutely the greatest gift we can ever receive and hold dear.
Your loved ones in Spirit are aware of how much they are missed during celebrations, and they wish to make their loving presence known. Family traditions are often carried forward in honor of a special person who has passed away. If you stop and think about them for a moment, do you realize in doing that, you are sending a "sign" to a loved one in Spirit that YOU are with THEM?
Have you ever considered that perhaps your loved one is looking for a "sign" from you?
I'm often asked about specific signs from loved ones who have passed, and the answer is the same for everyone. Whatever makes you think of your loved one and causes you to feel something emotionally or physically in that moment, that's your sign. There are so many ways for a loved one in Spirit to share a loving thought with you. Perhaps you'll see their name printed on a magazine in an odd space, find coins, or hear a special song on the radio as you scan through the channels. I've shared my story many times about my own personal sign from my older brother who passed 19 years ago. For many years, I've been finding paper money in the strangest places, and often in odd amounts. I've had five dollar bills being pushed up in my garden with the daffodils on my birthday in May. Once, I stepped onto a pile of cash in an empty parking lot, $168, the exact amount I needed for a doctor visit that week. It took me a LONG TIME to see the connection: my brother's name is Bill. It's almost embarrassing that I didn't get it sooner !
A few weeks ago I received a spectacular message in the form of two blue jays. I had woken up early that morning, full of excitement to film an episode for a new TV show. (It will be airing in a few months!) As I sat down at my desk with coffee, I was immediately drawn to look out the window into the the garden. There, perched on the fence, were two gorgeous blue jays, yapping and squawking to get my attention. Perhaps it's not uncommon in the Upper Midwest, except that I have never once, in 12 years of living here, seen a blue jay in my neighborhood. With my curiosity piqued, I did an internet search to see what special meaning a blue jay holds in animal lore. This is what I found: "Blue jay people are learning to embrace a more exciting, flamboyant and glamorous life while at the same time fitting in wherever they choose to land. Blue jay arrives onto the scene with beauty, color, energy and commanding attention like royalty or stardom walking on the red carpet."
The perfect message for a day of working on TV!
My Blue Jay visit inspired me to paint this for a friend.
The comfort granted through a small sign from a loved one cannot be conveyed in earthly terms. Honestly, I believe it sometimes makes the difference between living a day in peace, and wishing you would have never awakened. We can't know the pain of another, but this time of year we all really need to dig deep and find gentle compassion for the newly-bereaved and for bereaved parents.
The first few years without a beloved parent present during the holiday celebrations can be very difficult. It's a quandary for those who have been blessed with strong, close, parent-child relationships. No one ever takes a happy moment with a loved one for granted but the truth is, there are some mothers who set the room aglow with their holiday cheer. Those moms who fill every heart with tender joy and every belly with her secret recipes. There's always that crazy cousin or uncle who is life of the party and thrills everyone with his wild stories while the laughter lasts all night long. They are missed terribly at the holidays!
It would be just like that crazy cousin to pull a prank as a sign from Spirit, wouldn't it? Perhaps lights flickering? And your mom might send you a sign in the form of a familiar smell while driving in a closed car. Perhaps a friend will randomly email you a quote that happened to be a favorite of your loved one in Spirit. Keep you heart and eyes open to the many ways you can be touched by love.
We have to keep on, in whatever way we can, and look for those unexpected moments of serendipity that prove we never face a day alone.
There is another way you can be graced with hope from a loved one without even realizing it's happening. At some point, we all come up against a bad day, when the grief just hurts and the loneliness is overwhelming. We huddle up somewhere safe and alone, and release the tears. Eventually the tears dry up, the tissues run out and we find ourselves getting back to business. It's in those quiet moments that the love of Spirit is flowing directly into your Soul. The power or prayer or intention is unlimited, and you need to know that your loved one is praying for you, thinking about you and sending you all the love in the universe in those moments of despair. So silent is the exchange that you are unaware, but somehow, someway, you found the strength to pick up and try again. It's a gift of grace.
Above all, be gentle during this season. Be gentle with yourself and everyone you meet. Walk slower, listen more, compromise when you can, forgive, forgive and forgive. Be the gift of love to everyone you encounter.
©Mollie Morning Star 2014 Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.
The Gifts of Grief
It seems like an oxymoron to use the words "gift" and "grief" in the same sentence, yet, we have the free will to choose how we observe any occurrence in life.
Grief is usually described with every adjective imaginable that symbolizes energy loss.
In short, it sucks. It sucks our willpower, our joie de vivre, our hope and usually our dreams for the future, too. With time comes knowledge and some objectivity. When the loss is new, it is difficult to see anything resembling an offering from the Universe. Several years down the road however, those who are diligently doing inner spiritual work can list for you several important gifts that were disguised as lessons during the healing process of grieving.
It seems like an oxymoron to use the words "gift" and "grief" in the same sentence, yet, we have the free will to choose how we observe any occurrence in life.
Grief is usually described with every adjective imaginable that symbolizes energy loss.
In short, it sucks. It sucks our willpower, our joie de vivre, our hope and usually our dreams for the future, too. With time comes knowledge and some objectivity. When the loss is new, it is difficult to see anything resembling an offering from the Universe. Several years down the road however, those who are diligently doing inner spiritual work can list for you several important gifts that were disguised as lessons during the healing process of grieving.
Here are some of the most profound insights people have shared with me that arose as byproduct of their loss. If you are newly-bereaved, this list may give you hope for days that are a bit further down your path.
A deeper appreciation for the small, positive moments of life.
When people take a few minutes to reflect upon what they miss about a loved one who has died or left, I hear more about the small things people did than the big ones. The big things a wife might miss about her husband was his ability to take care of her and the family financially. Yet, if you ask her what she misses about him, the answers are always things like, "His roaring laugh." "He woke up before me every morning and made the coffee." "He always called me at lunch time." We may argue that we already appreciate how good we have it when a loved one is alive and well, but the value of such precious moments grows immeasurably when they are a memory instead of a present reality.
A need to correct misunderstandings as quickly as possible.
Your mother was right when she said not to go to bed angry. People die in their sleep; that's a reality. They also die suddenly from heart attacks, car accidents and natural disasters. There is never a better time to forgive and forget than right now. Reach out to someone with whom you have a discordant relationship, and offer the proverbial olive branch. Perhaps the differences cannot be resolved, but you can always let go with love instead of anger.
The ability to let go of differences and most disagreements.
My good friend Troy often says, "It just doesn't matter." The jewelry from your grandmother that you were supposed to inherit instead of your cousin? It just doesn't matter. That hateful comment posted on social media by someone you hardly know? It just doesn't matter. The friend who refuses to compromise? It just doesn't matter. Move on. Your life energy is more precious than money; be careful how and where you spend it. You could invest a lot of time into petty circumstances and consequently feel drained when something or someone truly worthwhile comes along.
A reduction in the fear of failure.
The biggest regrets in life are often the chances we don't take. This is not encouragement to repeat past mistakes; but sometimes our fears of failing, being humiliated, embarrassed, wrong or shamed prevent us from taking necessary risks in life to better our circumstances and relationships. The only guarantee in physical life is eventual death, and when you have dealt with that loss, it's possible to bury some of our fears with our loved ones. Life is meant for living and often the bereaved feel a new vitality surrounding their ability to try things that used to scare them.
Judgment of others is transformed into compassion.
When you have had to deal with loss due to suicide, drug abuse or tragic circumstances, your sense of compassion for the person dealing with the challenge/addiction/illness and their loved ones trying to cope with the situation is heightened immeasurably. As a naive person, it's quite easy to view a drug addict with a sense of disgust, but with experience comes wisdom. The ability to see another person for their light, bravery and connection to us through their Soul instead of their circumstances, is one of the most enlightened places from which to view the world. We need to see the addict as a Soul who needs unconditional love; the controlling individual as a Soul who needs additional security; the fearful human as someone who has been hurt and needs to be gently cared for. It always comes back to our collective, basic need for unconditional love. Do you accept that YOU need unconditional love, too? When we are able to let go of judgment in favor of compassion, we are able to give that same grace to ourselves.
In the wake of loss, this transformation gives us powerful new perspective to navigate the many changes of life.
©Mollie Morning Star 2014 Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.
Grief and the Soul's Journey
Here's a question I'm often asked:
When a loved one passes, can our feelings of grief and loss hold them to us or impede their journey in any way?
To the best of my knowledge and experience, the simple answer is no. Your feelings cannot alter the course of another Soul's eternal path. If that were possible, wouldn't they still be alive, right in your arms where you want them?
Here's a question I'm often asked:
When a loved one passes, can our feelings of grief and loss hold them to us or impede their journey in any way?
To the best of my knowledge and experience, the simple answer is no. Your feelings cannot alter the course of another Soul's eternal path. If that were possible, wouldn't they still be alive, right in your arms where you want them?
And if it were possible, wouldn't we also change the Soul's journey for loved ones who make destructive choices while here on earth? Anyone who has had a family member fall into substance addiction or abusive behavior has had to learn the very difficult art of letting go. It requires acceptance that we cannot control anyone's journey but our own. And so it is with our loved ones in Spirit.
Feelings of grief and despair are completely normal after a loved one dies. While we are experiencing these emotions, they feel foreign, terrible, unwanted, and we'd give nearly anything to rid ourselves of the pain. But none of those feelings can change the fact that grief is the normal reaction to the losing someone we love. Coping with those feelings as they arise on a day-to-day basis is difficult; accepting that your feelings are natural can help.
You are not alone in your sorrow. Grieving is a part of loving. The pain of loss is felt by all of humanity.
Yes, we feel the loss deeply. Yet our loved ones who have passed into Spirit are eternally connected to us through the bonds of love. No matter how many seasons pass, that bond always remains. Even if you recover. Even if you move on. Even if you find love with someone else. Even if you have another child. We are bound to time as a form of measurement here on the earthly plane, yet, in the eternal realm, our loved ones do not suffer from the same measurements. Our earthly lives are but a chapter in the whole story, and our loved ones in Spirit are able to observe and be aware of us from their dimension. The pain of separation we experience here on earth, is not their experience.
It's okay to feel your grief, as lousy as it is. Every wrenching moment of it is justified by your love. But you must not give up hope; grief, like all things, changes over time. Often it is transformed into a new perspective, a goal, or a sense of purpose. In fact, in time, many people are able to see and share the unexpected gifts loss has brought to them, such as:
- deeper compassion
- a closeness to nature
- a desire to be of service
- tolerance for human differences
- the ability to let go of petty grievances
These gifts are the phoenix rising from the ashes of our loss. Clouded by our sadness, they can sometimes go unnoticed. But if we are open to the possibility that we can learn from our loss, that we can create good from our sorrow, we will come to see that our grief and our continuing connection to Spirit can inspire us to breathe light and life into places of the heart we thought were gone forever. Maybe it's your Soul's journey, maybe it's the journey of your loved ones in Spirit, and maybe it's your shared path. In truth, in the midst of your loss, know that there is no greater legacy you could leave for those you are bonded to through eternity.
I hope you'll join me for an intimate evening of Spirit communication and messages. Click to my "Events" page to see all the cities.
©Mollie Morning Star 2014 Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.
Love Makes a Parent, Not DNA.
I kicked off the Fall Tour last week and had some wonderful messages about parenthood, adoption, abandonment and what it truly means to be a parent. At the event in Madison, an older gentleman come though, showing me a thick head of gray hair, giving me the names Mary* and Paul. A woman in the audience, Mary, recognized this to be her biological father who had given her up for adoption, whom she'd never met. It was a wonderful connection; a chance for him to recognize some of her accomplishments and also the difficulties she has endured.
I kicked off the Fall Tour season in Madison and Green Bay, Wisconsin this week and had some wonderful messages about parenthood, adoption, abandonment and what it truly means to be a parent. I love when we are able to share these experiences publicly in a group setting; the messages are healing to so many people. The healing continues, as I get validation over and over again from readers who are also healed by these stories.
At the event in Madison, an older gentleman come though, showing me a thick head of gray hair, giving me the names Mary* and Paul. A woman in the audience, Mary, recognized this to be her biological father who had given her up for adoption, whom she'd never met. It was a wonderful connection; a chance for him to recognize some of her accomplishments and also the difficulties she has endured. He explained that adoption wasn't his first choice; the situation had been out of his control. Mostly, he wanted her to know she is loved and wanted in this world and that from a spiritual standpoint, he is now supporting her. The father then brought the soul of Mary's deceased husband forward so he could also connect and create more healing. It was possibly one of the first acts of fatherly love that he was able to do for his daughter. Even after death, his desire to take care of her lives on. It was an emotional reading for everyone who witnessed it. There wasn't a dry eye in the house.
After that connection, I got the name of Mike and a connection to a young man who had passed in his early 20s in a car accident. A woman recognized this to be her ex-brother-in-law. Mike's message was about how he wanted to let her know he was looking out for her daughter, his niece. He acknowledged that she has support from his side of the family in Spirit, to help with the challenges of co-parenting with her ex-husband. The woman was crying and I could feel her releasing her stress as she realized that her ex-husband's family validated her struggle and was supporting her in Spirit. People in Spirit are pretty great! I then heard Spirit communicate to me, "Allan is here for the woman next to her in the aisle." I shook my head incredulously, hardly believing it myself and asked the woman sitting next to her if she had an Allan in Spirit. She instantly cried out, "That was my biological father!" In this situation, due to his addiction issues, he was not able to be a great father, and wanted to validate to her that she really matters to him, and he is no longer having that struggle. The woman's mother (Allan's ex) was also in the audience and got a long overdue acknowledgement for all she had endured.
The theme continued in Green Bay, where a young woman's grandfather came through. After a few minutes of evidence and messages, the most incredible thing happened. He wanted me to communicate to her, "Your biggest dreams are coming true now." Through her tears she quietly sobbed and said, "That's all I needed tonight. I just needed to know if he was okay with my situation." She confessed that although she'd had a close, loving relationship with her grandfather, her father had not been very involved in her life. She had recently decided to allow her step-father to adopt her. She had been worried her grandfather would be upset that she had terminated his son's parental rights.
The grandfather's message was beautiful and profound, and terribly important for many people to hear: "It's not about who gives the DNA, it's about who gives you love."
Adoption and parent-child relationships are viewed with great love and understanding by those who have passed into the afterlife. I have connected many adoptees to biological parents in Spirit, whom they never knew in the physical world. There is often very little evidence that the child knows to validate, but somehow, someway, a little gem of knowledge proves the connection. It is incredibly validating and healing for the child. Likewise, I have had countless connections where someone comes through and they feel "like a parent." I have yet to feel an energetic difference between someone who was a biological parent and someone who adopted or simply chose to love someone as their child. The connection is about the love and the relationship. If that connection exists in life, it remains in death.
Being adopted can leave many unanswered questions, so having a posthumous connection that answers even a few of them can be a life-changing experience. I have seen tremendous healing happen time and time again when these Souls are reunited. There is always hope for a fresh start, even a fresh start that begins when the physical life ends.
*Names have been changed out of respect for the privacy of those who received messages, although the names given during the readings were accurate.
©Mollie Morning Star 2014 Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.