Being a conduit of messages of healing and love for those who have passed on brings me back to the same emotional place, again and again, even after years of doing this work.
I usually get all broken up like this after doing many consecutive sessions with people who have lost a loved one unexpectedly or tragically. (Which is nearly everyone I work with.) This week it was triggered by a mother who lost a child she had devoted the last 10 years of her life protecting. It was followed by a question from a different mother who was deeply concerned her deceased son might feel she was “getting rid of him” if she scattered his ashes. Next came an evidence-packed message from a person who went missing in 2009. I don’t think I will ever get over seeing the shock on my client’s faced as they asked, “Do you think my sibling is dead?”
Deep breath. I reminded myself to breathe as I prepared to answer the question, as I do so now.
Life is about cherishing relationships. It’s the only “thing” we have that is real and lasting. And it is completely intangible: you can’t see, touch or buy it. It can only be felt, and to have that feeling of being close to another is the most precious and priceless experience we can have.
It is so easy to get caught up in our lives, perhaps the easiest misstep of all. We get ensnared into our stories and scripts: the ones we write and the ones we have starring roles in. We get obsessed over what people think of us (usually nothing, they are busy thinking of what you think of them), what real estate, car or status symbol we will get next, how we can get out of debt, or my favorite: what vacation we can take that will give us an escape from all of the above!
I am guilty. I am saddened to admit that I am speaking from experience. I too, have had extended time periods in my life where I operated solely in survival mode. I missed so many important events as a result: school plays, breakfasts together, dinner parties and I will never forget the year I missed summer. Living in Wisconsin, I can tell you, that’s tragic. I was just too busy to plant my vegetables or tend my garden.
I had a quick FaceTime chat with my sister-in-law over coffee one morning, who lost her Dad a few years ago. He was just in his early 60s when he passed unexpectedly. We concluded that the lessons of grieving are so painful and yet so important. One big lesson is to do things now. If there is anything that you want to do, need to do, should do, can do…the time for that is now.
It’s difficult to take a chance on being wrong, rejected, or failing at whatever it is that you decide you need to do, but your willingness to persist though those feelings will reward you with something much sweeter: peace. You might even qualify for the grand-prizes of lasting joy, satisfaction and fulfillment!
Listen: living life fully means taking these messages from the dead and turning them into lessons to live by.
No matter how much you’ve been hurt in the past, you still have to operate with a heart open to love.
You are going to have to fight feelings of inadequacy with positive self-talk the same way you resist urges to eat too much chocolate when you want to lose weight.
You will have to look at your schedule and your budget and make some tough decisions about what gets top-billing in your life.
I sincerely hope you choose to put people in the top spot. When it’s all said and done here on Earth, the things you take with you are the memories, the energy you invested in relationships and the love.
That beautiful home, the car you wanted so badly, and even that family ring that holds such sentimental value to you all stay here. The fame, acceptance and popularity you strived for mean very little in the afterlife when the playing field is leveled to a place where everyone is an incredible being of light.
The deceased communicate to help us live better in the here-and-now. The key to arriving at that place satisfied with the way you lived your life is to make choices now that create relationships filled with giving and receiving unconditional love.
And now I am back to where I was yesterday during that reading with a mother who recently lost her adult son.
“He shows himself standing next to you. I can feel the emotional closeness. His head is held high–he communicates that he received unconditional love from you and his father. He wants to thank you for this. It’s the greatest gift he ever received.”
He died of an overdose. He was, and still is, so very loved.
Don’t wait. Open your heart and push the edge of possibility right now!
©Mollie Morning Star 2016. Short excerpts of this article may be shared on the internet, provided a live link back to this original source is used. Reproduction in print is prohibited.